This video introduces modeling – probably the most important skill in NLP.
Modeling is probably the most important NLP skill. By observing and copying the ways others achieve results, it’s easy to suggest and try out different approaches to see what works for us.
The testing part is essential. It’s only by testing our work that we’re able to improve.
As with all NLP approaches, before you start, think about what you want to achieve. The three most common goals of NLP modelling are:
- Developing techniques to improve performance.
- Modelling bad behaviours as a way of knowing which strategies we need to avoid or to change.
- Using modelling to understand or know someone better. The more we’re aware of the way our clients think, the easier it is to develop rapport.
There is a truism: if you want to find out something, simply ask and watch. Then add the steps, test and improve, and you’re on the way to become a good modeller.
5 recommended approaches.
1. Simply Ask
Sometimes we make life unnecessarily difficult. If you want to know how to do something, find some people who are good at that thing and ask them what they do.
The test is : Can we make it work for us?
If that doesn’t work then move on to the approaches below.
2. Eliciting NLP Strategies
This is using meta-model and strategy elicitation questions to identify the modality (sensory) sequence that leads to a result. In asking these questions, choice points become apparent, leading to surprisingly easy change.
The best way to become good at this is through continual practice of meta model and strategy elicitation questions. It really is about practice, practice, practice.
Useful questions to elicit strategies include (they may be repeated several times):
“What happened before that?”
“What happened next?”
“What does that mean?”
“Tell me more?”
“How do you know?”
The approach lets us identify the triggers and anchors that give us keys to encourage or discourage specific behaviours.
Chose a behaviour that you wish to change.
- Elicit the sequence you go through to achieve that behaviour.
- Identify the triggers that encourage the behaviour.
- Make some small changes to the strategy so that you get a more useful result. For example, if we want to explore eating more healthily, we may have a trigger that when we see a chocolate trifle that we’re drawn to eat it. We want to change the result of the trigger and, for example, drink a glass of water instead.
- Future pace. Imagine that some time in the future when we see a trifle, we hesitate, smile and then drink a glass of water.
- Test. Purposely search out a trifle and see how easy it is to drink a glass of water instead of eating the trifle.
3. Pure NLP Modeling
This is a form of ‘deep trance identification’, and has a similar structure to the ‘perceptual positions’ exercise.
- Choose your success model – Select someone with skills you would like to explore and improve. It’s important that you’ve seen them perform the activity you want to model – either in real life or on film or video. The more time you spend watching and listening to them in a neutral state, the better..
- Imagine them performing. Sit comfortably, and imagine watching and listening to this person perform. Play a movie in your mind of their performance. Imagine yourself getting into rapport with them as they perform.
- Imagine (in any way that makes sense to you) floating into their body. Replay the movie as them, let them do the work, but see, hear, and feel what they see, hear, and feel as you replay the movie.
- Float back into your own body (again, in any way that makes sense to you). As you leave their body, take all the learning that’s useful to use now and/or any appropriate time in the future. In your mind, replay the movie, with you as the main actor, exhibiting all the useful attributes of your model.
- Repeat once or twice. So that you feel comfortable with your performance.
- Break state. For example, focus on the floor and notice the texture of the flooring, and then continue with whatever you want to do.
- Find a safe environment and practice your new skill. Keep practising, and take in any useful feedback.